I'm Baaaaccckkkkk......

Ok, I am back from volunteering at a community camp all last week. It was great.

Challenging. But Great.

Anyway, its a new football season, and I look forward to this time of the year, every year.

However, I think I am the only one in my household who does. When my beloved Liverpool are on the TV, don't talk to me. Don't look at me. Don't even think about me. I am not interested in hearing anything.

And heaven help you if Liverpool lose. Depending on who we are playing, and what the competition is, I can be mad for weeks... Or on the flip side, I can be happy for months... (Remember Athens 2005 anyone?).

Supporting Liverpool is more than just a hobby... Its a passion. I don't understand what it is that draws me to supporting a football team, after all it is just 22 men kicking a ball around, but then, do I have to understand it? Women collect shoes. The other half has hundreds, but she can only wear one pair at a time. I don't understand it, but I accept it.

I am silently optimistic about our chances for this year. I have hopes that we can challenge for the title this season, and whatever happens, let Man U and Everton be unsuccessful and I will be happy...

COME ON YOU REDS!!!!

Thou Shalt Not Lie...

Not just to others, but also to yourself. But it seems that people have not quite come to grasp with that idea, and as such, they end up lying to themselves.

And boy does this cause no end of problems.

Ever tried giving constructive criticism to someone who is not capable of being honest with themself? It's not the most productive conversation in the world. They become defensive, which means your words are falling on deaf ears, and sometimes they can become hostile. And should this person so happen to be in a position of leadership or authority, then you really are in trouble.

So what do you do in such situations?

Well, I honestly have no idea to be honest. You could try knocking some sense into him or her, but you might soon find yourself behind bars picking up soap whilst some dude called Bubba pretends to be a wild wild west gold miner digging for gold. Not something I would recommend.

You could try talking to them... but then again, isn't talking what got you into this situation in the first place?

What about ignoring them? Well, if you don't speak up, they continue to do a pile of crap, and isn't that what you are trying to get them to stop doing?

It is a losing battle.

And I hate losing.

Directions...

Ok, you know you are in trouble when you get on the bus, pay your fare, and then the bus driver decides to announce in the loudest voice possible that he needs to know if someone knows the way, as last time he got lost!

It could only happen in the bushland where I live.

I have been watching the TV, and can I just say, I am horrified to hear that some poor lady was thrown on the train tracks for asking two yobs to put out their cigarettes. They need to be locked up, or if she has any sons, locked in a room with them for a few hours, so they can get a good working over.

However, what is upsetting me is the news reporting of the case. If you have seen it, have you noticed that they describe what the two criminals were wearing, but as of yet have not released their colour? Now had it been two black guys, then you know that would have been the first thing out of the news reporters mouth; "The two suspects are described as being in their twenties and black...". On top of that we probably would have seen a photofit of the them by now, or they would have shown some part of the cctv clip so that people could help identify them quicker. Now far be it from me to say that the police don't want to catch these two criminals, or that colour is playing a part in it, but it does seem that way...

Anger Management...

Whats the best way to deal with your anger?

When I was younger, my first response would have been to hit someone. And I did.

Frequently.

As I have gotten older (I would say matured, but that would be a lie), I have since calmed down and with a lot of effort and will managed to control my anger. I learn't that if people could control my emotions, they could control me. I also began to understand the destructive side of my anger, and that hitting out in anger was not necessarily the best way of getting back at someone. For example, if a guy got me angry, and I beat him senseless, he would get over his injuries... But if he got me angry, and in retaliation I dated his sister.... Oooohhhhh Now that's the stuff of nightmares. Everytime he looked at his sister he would see me... Now that's torture.

Learning to control my emotions has as a result made me a calmer, more relaxed, but more dangerous person, if I get angry, it is usually that I am thinking clearest. And thats not usually a good sign for people.

I do thank God my anger is more in control, for if it wasn't, I would probably be typing this from behind bars, thats if I was even alive to type this now. Anger is not a good emotion it affects blood pressure, and all sorts of other biological processes.

In an attempt to control my anger I tried all sorts of things (besides hitting people). I counted to 10. Took deep breaths. I even managed to walk away once or twice, but in all honesty, none of these really ever worked. Then one day I stumbled on to the perfect anger management process...

Don't get angry in the first place!

What is love?

Your heart beat quickens, and deep inside you the butterflies swarm and begin to tickle. Maybe your palms get sweaty, and you get nervous and can't speak properly. Perhaps you even become sexually aroused... But do these reactions equate to love?

I remember feeling that way many years ago about someone. But did I love her?

1 Corinthians 10 says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.".

Looking back at the time that we spent together, I have realised that the time we spent together although some of the happiest times of my life, also some of the most destructive. See, this person knew how to push my buttons, and would at times enjoy doing so. I remember she would get me so mad, I would just have to lash out at something, and by the grace of God it was never her. But love is not easily angered nor does it remember wrongs according to 1Corinthians... So did I ever really love her?

I think I did. But that doesn't mean that she was the right person for me, far from it. In truth she brought out many of the darker sides of my character, and at times made me feel bitter and angry. It might sound bad, but she was a lesson that I had to learn... and a very hard one at that. See, at that time of my life, I had to learn what true love really is, and how to express it.

Love is not about the emotions we feel, but the choices that we make.

Love is learning to forgive even when we don't want to. Love is about staying calm and not allowing hurtful things to leave your mouth in anger. Love is taking time to explain things for the umpteenth time. Love is choosing to put that persons interests ahead of your own.

I'm married now. And I thank God it is to someone who brings out many of my better qualities. Someone who is able to put my needs, wants and interests before her own, and someone with whom I seek to do the same. Someone whom I do not speak in anger to, someone whom I fight against my self nature to be patient with. Someone who has yet to give me cause to need to forgive her!

I guess what I am saying is that I love you Mrs C, and I thank you for all that you have done, and continue to do for me.

Thank you for being the right person for me.

Colour...

Whats your favourite colour?

Most people like bright colours; the reds, the yellows, greens and blues.

If you could wear your favourite colour every day, would you?

I know most people would. Its not that they wouldn't wear another colour if they saw something they liked that wasn't in their favourite colour, its just that most people wish to go with what they like.

So why all the fuss when I told someone that I didn't see me marrying a white woman? Its not that I don't see any attractive white women when I walk down the street. Believe me, thats far from the case, there are many of them out there.

MANY!

But guess what my favourite colour is?

Guess whos coming to dinner...

Ok, so it wasn't my child bringing home an unexpected or unwanted partner, but it was a guest who decided to bring a friend of theirs. Now normally, I don't have a problem with this, after all, the more the merrier, isn't that how the saying goes?

The only problem is that this person seemed to have no home training and if he did, he seemed to have forgotten all of it. No, it's not like he put his elbows on the table, or chewed with his mouth full; its that he didn't seem to interact with other people in a way that was respectful and considerate of other peoples views and feelings.

Maybe conversation is truly a dying art, but so it would seem are good manners. I, in some ways feel sorry for the friend that I did invite. His behavior was not just an embarrassment to himself and his parents, but it also reflected badly on the aforementioned friend. He affected the mood of what should have been a pleasant and enjoyable meal with friends and family so greatly that some of legitimate guests actually left earlier than planned.

Still I am planning on having him back sometime.

I wonder how he deals with laxative in his food.....

Lawd Have Mercy...

Lawd have mercy... that was some good fish!

I have been looking forward to that salmon since I cleaned it, scaled it, seasoned and marinated it yesterday... And boy did it not disappoint!

Fresh salmon, seasoned with fresh garlic, fresh corriander, freshly chopped ginger, rock salt, freshly ground mixed pepper, and all left over night to marinate in freshly squeezed lime juice and honey. If you could have just smelt it... It was good enough to make a woman smuggle peanuts!

So... imagine now, its lightly pan fried so the fish is tender, but firm enough to stick your fork in... Then for a side dish, sauted potatoes and steamed greens.... Its making me hungry again.

Still, my day has not just been about food, no matter how much I have been thinking about my fish all day. Its more to life than just food.

There's sex!

Did you know it was National Orgasm day yesterday???

I mean seriously, National Orgasm day? Whats next? National Erectile Dysfunction Week?

I remember when National Days were meant to mean something. Remembrance Day. Mothers Day and Fathers Day before they became commercial tools by card companies to sell millions of pounds worth of cards; but now its become a joke.

I am going to campaign for a new national day. National No National Day Day! Lets see how they like that one!

Ahh, now that that is off of my chest... what else is there I want to exhale about...

Right. Doctors.

Have you ever been to the Doctor, and you know something is wrong with you, and they turn around and tell you, that thats how its meant to be? "Excuse me Doctor, my foot is facing backwards, and its turning black!", and the response you are faced with is a condescending smile and a "Oh yes, thats the way its supposed to be!". I feel like cracking the fools in their jaw, and blackening their eye and telling them, "Oh yes... thats how its supposed to be!", but I can't.

Apparently its not the Christian thing to do.

So I smile, nod, say thank you and tell them 'Jesus loves you', whilst thinking in my head, 'But I don't you stupid anus. Let me catch you in a dark ally and I am gonna kick your @$$ so hard my foot is gonna face back the right way!". Ok so perhaps that isn't a Christian thing to do either. I accept that, and am struggling with the anger management issues... But each day that I haven't gone postal, is a day that you should count your blessings, and if you are an atheist, should then know that there is a God.

After all... you are still breathing aren't you.

Man... Be a Man!

I feel quite meloncholy this morning. When it comes to kicking game, my fellow men are letting me down.


I was talking to a female friend last night, and I paid her a compliment, and she went off on one, not because of the compliment itself, but because apparently guys are always complimenting her, but never seem to close the deal. (She knows I am not single, so I assure you, this post is not directed at myself!). I guess I can understand her frustration. Its gotta be the emotional equivalent to blue balls - always being teased and never finding any release!

So whats going on out there guys? Have we lost our game, or have things just become too easy?

In my younger days, (and here I go exposing my age), you had to have game to even get a womans phone number... And if you wanted to actually get your freak on, you had to have serious game. Now, its like shopping in Tesco's where you get all this BOGOF offers. Buy One Get One Free - So now you can get some sex, and she will throw the phone number in for free! Perhaps the moral of the story is that perhaps we need slightly higher standards and morals... who knows?

I will finish this blog by giving a few tips to my fellow men out there:

1) Be yourself - Forget chat up lines, a simple 'Hi' or 'Hello' will suffice. Chat up lines are corny and unoriginal.

2) Be polite - Don't stare at her bangers... talk to her face.

3) Nice guys don't finish last... Doormats do - There is a difference between being a nice guy, and letting a woman walk all over you. Learn when to say yes, and when to say no, after all, you can't respect someone who kisses your @$$ all day. A good example of this is a friend of mine (and it hurts that even my friends are affected by this), who was so intent on impressing this young lady that he liked, that when her computer broke, he travelled miles (and by this I mean more then 50miles) to fix it for her... FOR FREE! And no, he didn't even get a 'tip' for his services.

4) Don't under estimate personal hygiene - If you know you have bad breath, learn sign language! Ok, no need for such drastic action, but carry some mints around with you. The friend I mentioned above, has tried to buss a move on quite a few women, and sadly I am placing the emphasis on tried. After being shot down faster than a black man outside a NY police station, they promptly got on the internet and told all their friends, who told their friend, who told me. My friends reputation is ruined all because of his bad breath!

I could go on and on about this all day, but I have things to do...