What is love?

Your heart beat quickens, and deep inside you the butterflies swarm and begin to tickle. Maybe your palms get sweaty, and you get nervous and can't speak properly. Perhaps you even become sexually aroused... But do these reactions equate to love?

I remember feeling that way many years ago about someone. But did I love her?

1 Corinthians 10 says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.".

Looking back at the time that we spent together, I have realised that the time we spent together although some of the happiest times of my life, also some of the most destructive. See, this person knew how to push my buttons, and would at times enjoy doing so. I remember she would get me so mad, I would just have to lash out at something, and by the grace of God it was never her. But love is not easily angered nor does it remember wrongs according to 1Corinthians... So did I ever really love her?

I think I did. But that doesn't mean that she was the right person for me, far from it. In truth she brought out many of the darker sides of my character, and at times made me feel bitter and angry. It might sound bad, but she was a lesson that I had to learn... and a very hard one at that. See, at that time of my life, I had to learn what true love really is, and how to express it.

Love is not about the emotions we feel, but the choices that we make.

Love is learning to forgive even when we don't want to. Love is about staying calm and not allowing hurtful things to leave your mouth in anger. Love is taking time to explain things for the umpteenth time. Love is choosing to put that persons interests ahead of your own.

I'm married now. And I thank God it is to someone who brings out many of my better qualities. Someone who is able to put my needs, wants and interests before her own, and someone with whom I seek to do the same. Someone whom I do not speak in anger to, someone whom I fight against my self nature to be patient with. Someone who has yet to give me cause to need to forgive her!

I guess what I am saying is that I love you Mrs C, and I thank you for all that you have done, and continue to do for me.

Thank you for being the right person for me.