Diary of a Homeless Man

Day two in the bedsit. (Imagine that said by the narrator of Big Brother!)

Well I guess its pretty apparent that nobody climbed through the window last night and killed us, although with the amount of sirens that I heard last night statistically speaking at least one of them should have been for me. The noise of emergency services sirens was incessant and did keep me up tossing and turning a fair bit in between changing diapers.

It was a pretty rough night for the little one. Perhaps he was feeling displaced or maybe like his parents he knows he shouldnt be here. Still, should and shouldn't dont play a part in any of this. All that matters is what is; and what is is that I and my fledgling family are homeless.

Everytime I say those words there is a flush as crimson as blood that floods my face whilst the searing heat of embarassment rushes from the soles of my feet to the crown of my head. the irony is not lost on me - a beggar with a crown? Could anything be more humiliating than having to say those words to anyone? Could anything de-masculate a man more than the failure to provide for his family their basic needs?

But self pity has no place in my life and my shame and embarassment is no longer for myself but for those that profess to be Christians. Those that would stand up and teach what it means to be a christian, those that would claim to baptise in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit yet at best be so cold, callous and insensitive? My plight is not of my own making and I will not let my circumstances allow me bury that fact under rightous self pity. The shame is on Newbold College and a number of people in positions of power within the Seventh Day Adventist Church to bear; it just so happens that my burdens arise out of their shameless actions.

The four walls that surround me will never dictate my worth no matter how small or how expansive they may be. Nor will the actions of loveless and compassionless people.

And so, for these reasons and a few others of which boredom was one, we spent the day walking around the local shopping district window shopping and talking. Ladies, if you feel like your husband is not listening to you then become homeless. then he has nothing else to do but listen to you! Still all things considered it was a pleasant day.

Now if I can just get past all the sirens, who knows - it may even be a pleasant night!